Light On A Hill
by lai-shai
Summary: "Antonio always seemed like someone Lovina just did not deserve..." Song inspired one-shot "Light On A Hill" by Margot and the Nuclear So & So's Spainxfem!S.Italy


_**A.N. Ok, so this is just a little one-shot I wrote last night while listening to Margot and the Nuclear So & So's BEAUTIFUL song "Light on a Hill". So yeah! It probably sucks, oh well. Please R&R! Everything is so appreciated :) **_

The more she thought about it all, the stronger her tears wanted to flow. Her eyes were hazed with them and her fists shook as she clenched the fabric of her red coat.

Lovina Vargas sat on the 3 am train ride from Madrid to Rome with a heartache that she had only ever felt but once before. She had called her sister earlier when she was in the train station to inform her of her unplanned visit:

_"Are you sure you want to come? You know Ludwig is staying with me, right?" Feliciana had asked apprehensively, knowing her sister's contempt for her German lover._

_ "Yeah, yeah, that's fine. I'll just stay in the guest room. It's alright, I'll figure something out when I get there. I just need to get out of here." Lovina answered back quickly, she could hear her voice breaking and face becoming hot. She couldn't break down here. No, not in front of all these people._

_ "Alright...I hope everything goes okay, Lovina. If you need anything else just call." Feliciana had said, Lovina could practically see the warm smile her sister was probably wearing over her phone._

_ "Thanks, Feli. I owe you one, for sure." She then went to close her phone, when her sisters voice interrupted again._

_ "Lovina?" _

_ She sighed, "Yes? What is it?"_

_ "Maybe you should call someone else back, too...I know he'll be happy you did." Feliciana said softly._

_ Lovina scowled and closed her phone. There was no way she could call that bastard. There was no way she could cry in front of all these strangers. Not now._

That conversation felt so long ago and the one she had shared hours ago with her once known lover seemed like an eternity.

"How could he have said that? He's never told me that..." Lovina whispered to herself, recalling the past events.

She sniffled, two tears rolled down her cheeks and onto the red fabric of her lap, dampening it. She wiped them away furiously. Even though she was alone in this large train, seated by a window, face away from everyone, she still had her dignity. She would never give that up.

Rain poured down endlessly, adding to her sadness. Normally she loved rain. That was only when she was with him, though. They would lay in his bed, curled next to each other, naming off certain things that they loved about one another. That felt so long ago...

A vibrating sensation suddenly interrupted Lovina's thoughts. She reached into her purse and looked at the screen of her phone.  
"**Antonio :)**"

She smiled mockingly. "Typical," she spat. That was the tenth time he'd called her since she left.

Lovina left the phone in her purse and curled back up to the cold window of the train, gazing beside out. She pulled her legs up beside herself, to make for a more comfortable ride. She felt so cold...so alone...so heart broken. In all honesty, she'd done it to herself. She'd left him all on her own. She made herself feel worthless.

For months now, it had been a continuous battle. Never was it his fault. Antonio was perfect, he always would be. This much she knew. But she would never be perfect. Every day was filled with lists of things she despised about herself, things that she would always keep secret from him.

He was always happy, charming everyone he met. He always treated her as a princess, loved her as a queen, and trusted her as a friend. There was never anything he did that made her feel terrible. And yet _he_ did.

Lovina didn't feel worth it. She didn't deserve him. She was terrible to him, she felt. Her harsh words she would spit so freely and her frowns and sour attitudes. His kind, loving heart needed someone just like him...and she knew it wasn't her.

_"Lovina? W-What are you doing?"  
She dared not even look him in the eyes, it would only make everything worse._

"_J-Just leave me alone! Don't talk to me or look at me, you bastard! I-It's...it's just...ugh!"_

_ Lovina furiously swiped her streaming eyes and grabbed her purse by the door. Antonio quickly jolted forward to grab her small wrist from making any other movements._

_ "No...por favor, mi amor. You can't do this, I've done nothing!" He pleaded softly, his face inches from her own. She could tell he was on the verge of tears...his voice was hoarse and soft. _

_ "Let go of me, Antonio!" Lovina threw back her arm, sending Antonio a few feet away from her. A hurt, pained expression pained clearly on the Spaniard's face._

_ "Can't you see? Maybe it isn't you! Maybe it's all me! It was never you, bastard. How dumb can you be, Antonio!"_

_ SLAM!  
The front door was closed, Lovina's coat and bag gone, and her sister on speed dial._

"I'm so terrible..." She sobbed in her seat.

She sniffled and held her face in her hands. Who could she fool...she loved him. Nothing could ever be done about that.

Everything was a blur to Lovina as she woke up the next morning. She was not in her previous surroundings, instead she was in HER old bed. At her sister's house. Although, the familiar sensation of loneliness was not present.

"Good morning, love." Said a familiar voice.

She turned to see her beautiful Spaniard, smiling sweetly and gently as he did in so many mornings past.

"Wha-...but how? W-Why are you-"

_ "_I came as soon as you left. I called Feliciana, so she knew I would be coming too." He kissed her forehead, "You fell asleep on the train, so I brought you here. I hope you don't hate me n-"

His sentence was cut short by Lovina's lips crushing into his in passion as they shared a much needed and long-awaited kiss.

"No. Of course I'm not mad...I have no idea what came over me. I just thought that I wasn't...good enough for you and that I'm such a terrible person to-"

"Shh," Now it was her turn to be silenced by lips.

"Never, Lovina Vargas. You are perfect. Your fiery, passionate attitude only makes me love you more. You're sweet smile is one of the greatest treasures any man could hope to achieve. Please...never change. I love you."

And for the first time, through clouded teary eyes, Lovina Vargas could confidently say, "I love you so much more."


End file.
